Bookmarks. . .That is what God put on my heart today. How many times do we think we close a chapter to later learn that all we did was put a bookmark there or rather God does? We are a family who God has greatly burdened for the plight of the orphans. It is our heart to personally do what we can and share with others so they too may develop hearts to help. But part of this journey is knowing what that is suppose to look like at each stage of our lives. When God called us to adopt Lydia, it was a turning point in a way of thinking. At our age, we realized that we had to choose to have excuses or obey. It would have been easy to have excuses. And with each child and each journey that is more so true. We have adopted two through DSS and two from China. We have also been foster parents. In fact. . .just before we began the process to adopt Lydia we closed the chapter on foster care (or so we thought). We honestly felt like the system, the biological parents, and even us had failed one of the children in our care. We watched him break. The grand finale was mother’s day week. We showed up for the scheduled visit with gift in hand and she did not show. I could visibly see his heart rip. No child should ever endure that kind of hurt and yet they do every single day!!! So I can honestly say that we had every intention to firmly close the fostering chapter forever. But you have heard the saying “never say never.” And God truly means never say never because your closed chapter very often is just His bookmark.
So we were done. On June 4th of this year, we were done firmly and completely. On June 5th, God changed BOTH of our minds to maybe. Maybe we could open our hearts to the hardest parts of foster care. Maybe we could love them and let them go (even if the situation didn’t seem the best). Maybe we could hear God’s voice telling us to move. I can honestly say, He was talking but we weren’t sure we wanted to hear what we were being told. Otherwise just try to explain two people who were desperately against something having a change of heart on the same day. One epic hurdle was going through the licensing process AGAIN. But we decided that obedience would be at least getting information. So we did and I received this back. . .”You may be able to just go through the re-licensing process, depending on the date of your closure. If so, you will have to have your 28 hours of training, updated forms, and a re-licensing meeting.” Then we discover that we already had almost all of our training hours done! All but the Fire Inspection (not previously mentioned) was completed on June 15th. Today we had our Fire Inspection which was our final item needed. That appointment was scheduled almost a month out but you know we needed that time. We needed time for our maybe to turn into yes. We needed time for God to keep showing us and keep whispering into our hearts. So I am so thankful for that time.
This morning as I prepared for the day. . .God showed me so many bookmarks. It was shocking to me. I like life neat and orderly. It is not. It is messy. When I have a project, I make a list and get it done and done to the best of my ability then move on. Perhaps for that reason He gives us bookmarks. When something is either too much good or too much bad, He gives us other jobs to do for a while then we go back to that old spot but yet He makes it new. My prayer is that while we have breathe, we will serve the Lord.
If you have questions about adoption, we will do our best to help you and then point you where you can get more information. There are so many ways to help and not all of them include adoption. yet they are all so important. You can make a huge difference!
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